


i am found

by byronicmaiden



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Balance in the force, Ben Solo Lives, Canon Divergent, F/M, Fix-It, Force Ghost(s), Happy Ending, I Was Drunk When I Wrote This, Planet Naboo, Redeemed Ben Solo, Redeemed Sheev Palpatine, Redemption, Rey Palpatine, Sad with a Happy Ending, Self Acceptance, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Fix-It, YOU get a happy ending and YOU get a happy ending and YOU–, i am going to single handedly redeem every villain ever written, i hate TROS so much it’s unreal, not TROS compliant, references to Darth Plagueis by James Luceno, rey isn’t a fucking coward and accepts her heritage, rey pulls a ROTJ luke skywalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 07:01:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22859653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byronicmaiden/pseuds/byronicmaiden
Summary: come, my darling, homeward bound.au: rey does the unthinkable.she saves her family.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Darth Sidious, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 14
Kudos: 39





	i am found

**Author's Note:**

> _”it’s so easy to laugh, it’s so easy to hate  
>  it takes guts to be gentle and kind.”_  
> –“i know it’s over”, the smiths

The sky is full of lightning. She looks up and it flashes in her eyes, turns them an electric blue.

She turns her head and looks at him. His arms are outstretched in an almost welcoming gesture.

“Luke Skywalker was saved by his father,” he says. “The only family you have here is me.”

She steps forward, and her footsteps are silent, but each one seems monumental. The grey silt puffs around her feet as she walks towards him, to the throne. Her throne.

“I knew you would make the right choice, my granddaughter. Now– take Skywalker’s saber, and strike me down once and for all. Reach deep inside yourself and find all of your hatred. You are angry at me. You hate me, for what I have done. Use it. Give in to your desire for vengeance! You are the daughter of the Sith! Our blood flows through your veins! Do it. Kill me. I beg of you.”

Her lips press together in a tight line as tears well in her eyes. She lifts the saber into the air, her finger brushing across the button.

She moves her hand from behind her back, revealing it to be empty.

“I am Rey Palpatine,” she says. “Last of the House of Palpatine.”

She walks towards him, places a foot on the first step to the throne.

“Blood of the Sith, blood of Naboo. A thousand generations of horror live inside me. As they do you. You carry the weight of every Sith ever burned, tortured, executed, convicted for their faith.”

She continues making her way towards him, until he is cornered by her and the throne.

“The world has stolen your heart and replaced it with the ashes of a frightened little boy. You have been turned into a monster by a world that has showed you no compassion. A world that has made you angry and unkind and afraid. But I see your heart, Grandfather. I see who you used to be. A little child afraid of his father. A young man afraid of his master. A boy who was exploited and corrupted. A lonely, pitiful creature of darkness who is surrounded by nothing and no one but fear and death. A man who is half-alive, clinging to a tiny bit of childish hope.”

She reaches for him. “I see your hope. I see that spark inside you, the one you have been unable to snuff out. It is a flame that once burned so bright, until your family suffocated it. It is still there. He is still there. That little boy you used to be. The one who wanted a family to love him.”

She lunges forward and wraps her arms around him, burying her wet face in his chest, hiding herself in his robe.

“You have it, now.”

From their hearts, a burst of lightning erupts, filling the sky with blue light, breaking through the heavy black clouds.

He is silent, frozen in terror as she holds him tighter, his body paralyzed.

“I will not hurt you, Grandfather,” she says. “You are the only family I have.”

He moans in anguish, like it is all too much for him. “This is not the way of the Sith,” he says, clutching his chest.

“But it is,” she says. “This is the only way. I am the Sith. I am all the lost children who have succumbed to the darkness. I am you. I am what you once were.”

Above their heads, the clouds part like the Red Sea, both Imperial and Resistance fleets retreating from the growing light.

“I have not come to destroy you. I have come to save you,” she says.

The ray of sunlight above them grows, the blue lightning blooming from both of them. Light gasps through the clouds.

A blue scar cracks across his face, the light inside bursting through his facade. His face begins to fall apart. The mask of Darth Sidious crumbles like dried clay.

Around them, the colosseum begins to tumble down.

“I have waited so long to hear that,” he says.

His body goes lax as he falls into her embrace, and their power merges, erupts in a burst of blue light.

A ringing deafens her as she rolls onto her stomach, climbs onto her knees. The Sith are gone. The fleet is gone. The world is quiet.

She sees him across the colosseum, lying on the dais steps. She runs to him and falls to her knees, takes his hand in her own.

“Grandfather,” she says.

He is dying. He has always been dying, she thinks. But it is not Darth Sidious she sees. It is not the Emperor, either. It is a man who is very tired.

His hair is white and filthy, strewn with dust and skin. He reaches for her and she takes his hand.

“I will not leave you, Grandfather. I came here to save you. And I will.”

“You have already saved me,” he says.

Tears spill down her face, leaving streaks in the dirt.

She hears footsteps behind her. “Rey!”

It is Ben Solo, blaster in hand.

“Rey. The planet is imploding. We have to leave.”

“But– “ she looks at her grandfather. She looks into his eyes. They are not the milky white eyes of a corpse, nor are they the flaming yellow fires of a Sith. They are blue and bright and terribly happy.

“I will always be with you, Rey,” he says. “As long as you keep me in your heart. Because you are a good person, and you have a kind heart.”

She knows he has done bad things. She knows the whole world wants her to hate him, to kill him, to send the Jedi victorious. But she can’t. She cannot hate him, because he is her family, the only family she has. She will do what others never could, and succeed where they failed. She will love all the monsters, even the ones who aren’t pretty or soft or soaked in sympathy.

Rey chokes on her sobs and clings to his hand as it goes limp in her grasp.

“But– but you’re dying,” she gasps.

“I have been dying a very long time,” he chokes out. “But you still have the chance to live. And Ben– “ he looks to the man beside his granddaughter.

“If I am giving out apologies...you are certainly most deserving of one. I wanted to twist your soul...as my master did to me...”

Ben blinks at him, and there is recognition behind his eyes. He knows how it feels. It is the same way he felt about Rey so long ago, when he begged her to join him. It is the circular effect of trauma that turns victim into villain, boy into monster. It is the desire to do the same to others, to no longer be the victim– and, perhaps, even more so than that, to simply no longer be alone.

“And I don’t ask that you forgive me...for I know I don’t deserve it. All I ask is that you don’t...waste your life...living in anger...” he gasps as his fingers stop twitching. “Either one of you...”

Rey sobs as he shuts his eyes.

* * *

She brushes rust from his saber hilt, scratches across the corroded metal. She presses the button and activates the red blade, for the last time.

She places the saber in the lake, lets the water douse out its flame, lets the waves lap it up and carry it out with the current, pull it far into the blue until it sinks to the floor.

She is dressed in layers of grey, bits of black and bits of white strewn about, a woven hood resting on her shoulders. Beneath the sun, the copper highlights of her hair shine proudly. She has never noticed it before– how red her hair can be.

Ben places a hand on her shoulder, and gives her a slight smile, that smile she has only seen once and already loves.

“I wish we could’ve grown up here,” she says. “With our grandparents...Amidala and Palpatine, back home on Naboo. It’s kind of poetic, isn’t it?”

He gives a breath that she recognizes as his version of a laugh. “You always have to find some deeper meaning, don’t you?”

She giggles and playfully smacks his arm.

“Besides,” he says. “It’s not too late. To...I don’t know, build a life here, or whatever. We could fix up Varykino, or something.”He shrugs, embarrassed of his sentimental offering. Rey smiles, takes his face in her hands, leveling their gazes.

“I’d really love that, Ben.” She pulls him close to her and kisses him.

Their kiss is interrupted by approaching footsteps. An elderly woman, a shepherd, looks at the mismatched couple as they break from their embrace.

“It’s been so long since we’ve had visitors to the Lake Country. No one has been here since that lake house was abandoned.” The woman looks over the surrounding mountains.

“Who are you two, anyways?” she asks.

“Oh. This is Ben,” she says. “And I’m Rey.”

The woman raises her brows. “Ben and Rey who?”

Rey blinks at her, looks up at Ben, who gives her an assuring nod. _It’s okay. It’s okay._

She looks across the rolling green hills. Her grandfather smiles at her. His eyes are blue again. His hair is a shimmering red, one not even the blue tint of phantasmagoria can diminish. His face is pink and full, and he is smiling. He is not dying at all. He is more alive than he has ever been.

Beside him, she sees Jedi, Sith and unaligned alike, dozens of flickering spirits, their radiance projected across the Naboo countryside. Padmé and Anakin, side by side. Luke, Leia, Han, her parents. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Mace Windu, Yoda. Darth Maul, Count Dooku, Asajj Ventress, all of them and more. They are no longer waging useless war. For once, the galaxy is at a true balance.

“This is Ben Amidala,” she says. “I’m Rey Palpatine.”

There is no shame in her voice. It is not the hollow voice of someone beaten into repression. It is the proud declaration of a Sith princess.

She smiles, and exhales at last.

**Author's Note:**

> TROS was bad and the only way for the rey palpatine twist to work was if rey redeemed palpatine just like luke did with vader. the reason ROTJ is such a good movie is because luke challenges not only the other characters expectations, but the audiences expectations as well. we are told darth vader is pure evil and luke must kill him, that this is the only way. but luke refuses, and in doing so, saves the galaxy.
> 
> we are told palpatine is pure evil and rey must kill him. and that’s what happens. no emotional challenge, no inner conflict, no message of family. just a Hero killing a Villain and then living her entire life in isolation and repression.
> 
> luke shows love and he saves the world. TROS rey shows hate, and the war continues waging on. there is no resolution to be found in anger and revenge.
> 
> the question i’m sure you’re all asking is: can palpatine be redeemed? does palpatine deserve to be redeemed?
> 
> to answer the first question: we’ll never know, because no one ever tries.
> 
> to answer the second question: who cares? that’s not the point. luke doesn’t save vader because he “deserves” it. killing vader was probably more likely what he “deserved”. but, to quote wonder woman, “it’s not about deserve. it’s about what you believe. and i believe in love.”
> 
> the title and description are both from “show yourself” from frozen 2, which always made me think of if rey accepted who she was. i listened to it while writing this, as well as “know who you are” from moana and “down once more” from phantom of the opera.
> 
> also i’m sorry if the quote at the beginning is incorrect, i can’t bring myself to rewatch that god awful scene to fact check it.
> 
> while i had this idea since i first saw TROS, a comic by missbliss12 on tumblr definitely played a hand in the inspiration for this: https://missbliss12.tumblr.com/post/190358928854/a-rewrite-of-the-i-am-all-the-jedi-scene-in


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